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How To Write the Perfect Online Dating Message

Online Dating for the Computer ShyOne of the more popular – and free – online dating sites, OK CUPID, wants to be sure that you are able to land the date that you’re trying to get.

It makes their site more helpful, and drives more traffic to them.  Can’t blame them for trying.

So after analyzing over 500,000 “first contact” messages that passed through their site, here’s OK CUPID’S TOP SEVEN TIPS FOR LANDING THAT FIRST DATE.

In other words, follow these rules and maybe your first message to that potential new BFF may actually get a reply.  Be sure to click through to the OK Cupid site for all the detailed charts, graphs, and percentages:

  • Be Literate.  Using normal spelling and grammar will give you up to a 37% response rate vs TyPiNg aS if u were still in 2nd GR8D.  On the other hand, using “LOL” or “HAHA” are signs of having a sense of humor, so their use is perfectly okay and can increase the reply rates even more.
  • Avoid Physical Compliments.   You haven’t seen this person beyond the fake Photoshopped/cropped photo that everyone else is using.  Try not to be THAT guy.
  • Use an Unusual Greeting.  It’s that whole “first impression” thing.  It works.
  • Don’t Try To Take it Outside.  In other words, don’t be THAT guy and try to strike up a conversation outside the safe confines of the site setup.
  • Bring Up Specific Interests.  Make yourself sound interesting.
  • If You’re a Guy, be Self-Effacing.  If you don’t know what that means, then you’re already not doing it.  And don’t use the word “please”.
  • Consider Becoming an Atheist.  Religious overtones tend to scare that initial contact away.