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According to Fox News, it’s the worst Laffy Taffy joke ever written


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Web Watch is not beyond sharing a good joke or pun once in a while.  Heck, we enjoy sharing BAD jokes and puns even more.

But we don’t eat Laffy Taffy, so we didn’t know the joy that the jokes written on the inside of the Laffy Taffy wrappers could bring so much joy to so many people of all ages.

That is, until WE STUMBLED UPON WHAT FOX NEWS IS CALLING THE WORST LAFFY TAFFY JOKE EVER WRITTEN.

The joke is quite simple:  “Q: WHICH GARDEN HAS THE MOST VEGETABLES?”  A: FLASH GARDEN.

Seriously?  A Flash Garden?  WTF?

The person who read this joke to us immediately dismissed the joke as “stupid” and “doesn’t make any sense.”  Web Watch, being the curious type that we are, immediately jumped to the task — there had to be a story here.

And apparently there is — “Flash Garden” has even been listed in Urban Dictionary as being the punchline to a Laffy Taffy joke.  You don’t get that kind of notariety unless there’s something bigger going on.

Web Watch thinks the answer to the problem is the same issue that has PLAGUED OTHER BAD LAFFY TAFFY JOKES OVER THE YEARS – poor spelling and grammar checking.  Obviously, the question wasn’t “Which garden has the most vegetables?”, but rather “What type of garden grows vegetables the fastest?”  (Web Watch will purposefully avoid making any Flash Garden jokes that pertain to Britney Spears or Paris Hilton paparrazi photos… make your own joke if you would like)

Here’s the interesting part – that joke is STILL being printed on Laffy Taffy wrappers.  Even after the Fox News piece on it, and countless Internet comments about what Flash Garden means.  Even after WONKA released a press release in JANUARY 2007 entitled “Wonka® Responds to Laffy Taffy® Humor Crisis with Management Changes”  That’s right – Laffy Taffy is getting more mileage out of a bad joke on their wrappers by continuing to print it years after the bad joke was originally discovered and reported… or they had such a large supply of pre-printed wrappers that there’s no chance we’ll ever see any new jokes soon.

All told, this was a situation where Wonka decided to turn a potential PR nightmare into lemonade by making a joke promotion out of the situation, recruiting new funny into their Laffy Taffy product.  While the contest itself is over, we’re reproducing the press release here for your amusement:

Willy Wonka Candy Factory, January, 2007 / — Willy Wonka and the management of the Willy Wonka Candy Factory were astounded last week to learn that one of the jokes on the Wonka® Laffy Taffy® wrappers was, in fact, not funny.

Fox News online was the first to report on the issue. For full Fox News coverage visit: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,235301,00.html

Today, the Willy Wonka Candy Factory announced the dismissal of the company’s deputy executive director of Wonka Laffy Taffy wrapper humor management. He was responsible for allowing a very un-funny joke to get in the hands of Wonka® Laffy Taffy® candy fans and there is simply no excuse for that. The last straw was the recent revelation that a second joke that appeared on the back of the Wonka® Laffy Taffy® wrappers was, in fact, not wacky at all. The content of that second un-funny joke is a closely held secret that only Willy Wonka himself knows.

The announcement was made in a statement by Willy Wonka that was read aloud and posted online by a representative from the Willy Wonka Candy Factory. The statement is available online at Wonka.com. Click on the “Are You Funny” button on the home page to be directed to a version of the video.

The statement noted “I was astounded to learn that one of the jokes found on the back of Wonka® Laffy Taffy® wrappers was, in fact, not funny. Wonka® Laffy Taffy® is stretchy, fruit-flavored taffy with a long-lasting chew that you can enjoy for a really long time. Every wrapper includes a joke and the Oompa Loompas and I at the Wonka® Candy Factory are committed to providing only the funniest jokes available.”

The statement continued, “I simply won’t stand to have puns that aren’t punny or capers that aren’t crazy associated with the Wonka name.”

The un-funny joke that gained national media attention was found on a banana-flavored Wonka® Laffy Taffy® wrapper. It read, “Which garden has the fastest growing vegetables?” The answer: Flash Garden. It seems few people remember the TV series Flash Gordon from the 1950s. Among those who do remember the show, it didn’t really matter either – nobody laughed.

Additionally, an internal investigation has revealed more than two dozen candy fanatics and bloggers have used Internet postings to share their thoughts on the disappointing joke, or the general lack of humor of some jokes currently appearing on Wonka® Laffy Taffy® wrappers. Willy Wonka and his team have begun direct outreach to those individuals to address their concerns.

Wonka Launches Humor Study Group

The series of sweeping actions to address the situation also included the following:

Willy Wonka formed a Humor Study Group (HSG) to review all Wonka® Laffy Taffy® wrapper jokes. This group includes Willy Wonka’s entire outfit of Oompa Loompas, naturally. Invitations have also been issued to two Supreme Court Justices, a well-known and very funny movie star, four beauty queens and seventeen regular Saturday morning cartoon characters to participate.

The Humor Study Group will review jokes on the backs of wrappers until Willy Wonka is satisfied that that no other un-funny jokes remain. Some examples of the jokes the Humor Study Group will review include:

  • Where did the kittens go on the class trip? To the meow-seum
  • Why was it hard for the geometry teacher to walk? She broke her angle

Willy Wonka has also asked Wonka® Laffy Taffy® fans who know of, or suspect, that a joke is not funny to tell him. He is also accepting new, funny jokes for consideration. More details are available on Wonka.com Click on the ‘Are You Funny’ button on the home page.

Wonka Candy Factory Job Opening

Finally, Willy Wonka has begun a nationwide search for a new deputy executive director of Wonka Laffy Taffy wrapper humor management.

Complete remarks to the media are available online at Wonka.com.

Applicants are asked to submit two jokes, three puns and a description of a humorous situation guaranteed to make both a fourth grader and a 70-year-old fall down laughing.

People interested in applying for the open deputy executive director of Wonka Laffy Taffy wrapper humor management position can send their applications to Willy Wonka Candy Factory, Laffy Taffy “Jokes” Entries, P.O. Box 72309, Rockford, MN 55572. Additional Information, including a downloadable job description, is available online at Wonka.com.

One reply on “According to Fox News, it’s the worst Laffy Taffy joke ever written”

You guys are lame….this is NOT the worst joke ever. It is a play on words for Flash Gordon…you know the guy in the comic strip that was so fast. Hence the garden has the most vegetables because they grow in a “Flash”!! Duh!!!!

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