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The Most Perfect Breasts in the World (scientifically speaking, of course)

Leave it to those wacky scientists – one has discovered the SECRET FORMULA FOR PERFECT BREASTS.

In a paper entitled “Concepts in Design for Breast Augmentation” being presented at a breast enlargement conference being held in London this week, scientist Patrick Mallucciwill share the findings that he came up with after studying hundreds of topless celebrity photos.

Mallucci said, “I studied a wide variety of photographs of the most popular topless models to work out the various proportions they had in common and what made those particular features attractive.”