Business Insider is reporting a disturbing new trend in employee response to the current economy: DISGRUNTLED EMPLOYEES ARE POOPING AROUND THE OFFICE.
Merrill Lynch spokespeople are not confirming this, but employees are reporting that they found a turd in the stairwell of the New York bank headquarters last week.
Nobody has come forward to claim ownership of the poo.
This is not the first time someone has mysteriously defecated around the Merrill Lynch offices. In January 2008, an unnamed equities trader made quite a poop spectacle in the restroom, purposefully covered his shoes in their fecal artwork, then proceeded to walk around the office to leave smelly poo prints everywhere. All because of a reduced bonus.
The 2008 incident was reported by CNBC’s Charlie Gasparino. Web Watch is dumbfounded how this even made the news that day, let alone this repeat incident.
Web Watch knows what you’re thinking – one or two isolated incidents can’t possibly indicate a trend.
If so, then you didn’t see today’s headline, FEDS PLUG LEAK: ALLEGED ELEVATOR URINATOR CHARGED.
In this case, someone was urinating in the Internal Revenue Service’s freight elevator in their Detroit office. The suspect was caught on video tape, and criminal charges were filed against the IRS contract employee who admitted peeing in the elevator for months.