Web Watch loves karaoke as much as the next person – which is to say that sometimes we really love it, and sometimes we really hate it.
Karaoke is one of those party activities that you can’t plan on being a hit. If you have a karaoke machine in your living room, we guarantee that nobody will want to fire it up and start singing when you say, “hey, who wants to do karaoke with me?”
On the other hand, if your friends know it’s available and are drunk enough – you’ve given them enough rope to lead themselves to hitting the power button and starting the games themselves.
Which leads us to…
Web Watch’s TOP FIFTEEN RULES FOR KARAOKE:
- You can’t force a karaoke to happen. It just does. Either people want to sing or they don’t.
- Don’t get up to sing if you are going to pass the microphone to someone else who can’t sing either
- Use the microphone. If you don’t know how to use a microphone, here’s a hint: if you can’t kiss or smell the microphone, you’re holding it too far away from your face
- Don’t turn a non-duet song into a duet. Corollary: if you’re singing a duet, know which part you’re going to sing before you get up on stage
- Songs we are tired of hearing at karaoke night: Love Shack, Wanted Dead or Alive, Bohemian Rhapsody, Don’t Stop Believing
- If that song has already been sung that night, try waiting a few hours before trying to sing it again. Karaoke is about variety, not hearing the same song over and over again.
- Don’t be the jerk who sings a seven-minute song. Karaoke songs should be four minutes or less to allow time for everyone to sing, The only exception to this rule: Paradise by the Dashboard Light
- If you don’t know the song, then don’t request the song. Nothing kills karaoke night more than when someone just stands there staring at the screen.
- Whether you are a good singer or a bad singer – OWN it. Crowds are more forgiving to bad singers who are enthusiastic about what they’re doing. Be entertaining, no matter how good or bad you are.
- You can steal another person’s signed up song – but only if they’ve left the bar
- If the song contains racial slurs or other bad words, you might want to skip over them. If you (or the crowd you’re with) don’t use those words in your own everyday life, then karaoke is not an excuse to start throwing them out just because the lyric says it. Skip the words, replace the words, do something other than using the actual phrase.
- Don’t sing Sweet Caroline before midnight. People need to be drunk
- Karaoke songs should be fun and lighthearted. Slow, depressing songs just kill the room, no matter how well you sing
- Props: If you’re going to sing Red Solo Cup, be drinking from a Red Solo Cup when you do
- If you’re too good, you’re not doing it right