How To

How long does it take the average person to poop?

How much time do you spend in the bathroom when it’s time to go?

Are you a Super Duper Pooper, able to squeeze one out in a matter of seconds at any time of day?  Or are you more the type of person who will wallow in the bathroom stall with the entire Sports section of the daily paper and then wonder why you didn’t think ahead to bring in the stock pages too?

The Potty Monkey (with Timer!)
The Potty Monkey (with Timer!)

You know, it really doesn’t matter what you do in there.

Some people look at their bathroom or bathroom stall as a personal retreat. An oasis of solitude.  A place where you can be alone, if only for a few minutes each day, to take care of one’s business.  Privately, quietly.

But is your 30 minute routine really the norm?  Are you taking more time in the bathroom over the course of the day than your co-workers are with their smoke breaks?

Maybe so.

That’s because maybe you really are wasting your time in there.

That’s the conclusion of a 2003 STUDY OF BATHROOM HABITS that measured how much time people were taking to move ones’ bowels.

And what they found was that the average person using an average European-style toilet — the one we all know and love (as opposed to the more rustic hole-in-the-ground approach — takes an average of 130 seconds to complete their process.

More than 2 minutes to empty ones’ bowels.  On average!  Which means there are some people who are taking way way too long… matched up with an equal set of people who are able to complete the task lickity-split.

And that may be the only time you want to use the word “lickity” in a story about dropping the kids off at the pool.

So we ask – is 2 minutes an appropriate amount of time?  Are you more of a 5- or 10-minute retreater?  Or do you just take care of what you need to take care of and get out of Dodge kind of guy – done in 30 seconds or less?

What should be the right time? Let us know if you agree with that study in the comments below…