Should women be astronauts? Sure – just be sure to drink their pee


By web gangsta | Published:

Astronaut Barbie
Astronaut Barbie

There are some people who say that women shouldn’t be astronauts. 

It really doesn’t matter who those idiots are, because we have people like Dr William Rowe, and his website FEMALES IN SPACE, which offers many scientific and medical reasons why women are superior astronaut material.

One of the reasons Dr Rowe offers is that WOMEN HAVE BETTER MAGNESIUM RETENTION, and therefore would be better on long space flights, such as to Mars.  Apparently, because women have more magnesium than men, they could survive longer bouts that in-space exercise programs (or lack thereof) have depleted from astronauts’ bodies on previous space missions.  More magnesium means they can last longer.

Makes sense to us.

Heck, Dr Rowe once argued in the Journal of Men’s Health and Gender that an all-women space crew would be ideal, claiming that higher estrogen levels can help reduce heart attacks and other cardiovascular problems in space.

Let’s take a look at this last point, shall we?

NASA has already published a paper on CARDIOVASCULAR HEALTH CONSEQUENCES OF LONG-DURATION SPACE FLIGHT, so we know this is an important topic to cover.  The book PRINCIPLES OF CLINICAL MEDICINE FOR SPACE FLIGHT has entire sections devoted to how long- and short-term exposure to micro-gravity can significantly alter an astronaut’s cardiovascular system.

So additional estrogen is considered a good thing for astronauts, in terms of preventing heart problems.  Which may be one benefit that those on the space station get from DRINKING RECYCLED URINE.

Huh?

Yeah, you knew that the astronauts were using a “closed loop” water system, where all their sweat and pee, along with humidity in the air — and the sweat and pee obtained from any on-board lab animals — were all processed through an amazing filtration system that purifies the waste water and turns it back into something drinkable.

It’s true!  (C’mon – you’ve all heard about urine therapy and how good(?) it can be for you.)

So here’s the thing – apparently, these water purification systems, both the ones on the space station as well as those here on Planet Earth – are having a tough time removing estrogen from the water supply.  This is true whether it’s recycled water in outer space, or at the water treatment plant down the street.

And it’s all reportedly linked to women who take birth control pills and have the nerve to pee into our waste water system.  In other words, our drinking water is becoming more and more filled with estrogen, whether you like it or not.

And on the space station, female astronauts may decide to take birth control pills while on a space mission.  It makes sense if that’s what they choose to do — but the unexpected outcome is that all the drinking water on the space station then becomes an estrogen cocktail.  Which, based on Dr Rowe’s theory we mentioned above, may end up being a good thing in the future for those planned long-distance space flights.  Just one of those Eureka! moments that scientists dream about.

So drink up everybody!  It’s heart-healthy!