10 Things

Top reasons why people shouldn’t rush into marriage

Web Watch, like many of you, have seen our share of weddings and divorces from friends and family.

We’ve seen friends move from casually dating, to serious dating, to getting engaged and more.  Web Watch knows one person who’s had three weddings in 10 years time.

Some people just like being married, it seems. 

The Marriage Mistake, by Jennifer Probst
The Marriage Mistake, by Jennifer Probst

But whenever Web Watch hears of a new engagement in our circle of friends, the question of when the wedding date is set for always comes up.

Sometimes, the happy couple already has a venue picked out and their Save the Date cards all set and ready to go by the time the engagement announcement goes out the door.  Other times, the couples are a bit more laid back, choosing to wait another year or two to perhaps build up equity before purchasing a house together, or getting the rest of their financial and physical houses in order.

Jumping into marriage before the couple knows each other well has proven to work well for some pairings, and been disastrous for others.  That’s why you may want to consider THESE ENGAGEMENT TIPS to ensure that you’re ready to move forward with the next step in your lives.

  • CAN YOU TALK WITH YOUR PARTNER?   What are some of the topics that you cover on a regular basis?  Do you have those long car rides or walks in the park where you just talk about life, your future together, things going on in the world today?  Financial concerns, success stories, how you feel about each other in full honesty?  If you’re unable to tell your partner honest truth about how you feel on any topic, then you may find yourself regretting having never had that conversation earlier when it comes up at a critical junction down the line.
  • IS YOUR ENGAGEMENT SUCCESSFUL?  How well does your partner listen to you, or you to your partner?  Do you converse well with each other… and with other people. How do you present yourself as a “couple” versus two people who are just dating and happen to be in the same room together?  Are you both focused on the same things — is one person looking primarily at buying new shoes while the other is trying to cut credit card bills?
  • HOW WELL DO YOU COMMUNICATE?  We’re not talking about just talking with each other — this is all about whether you can get your point across without fighting.  And if you do fight (some conflict isn’t a bad thing for a healthy relationship), how well do you work through the conflict?  Do you work it out together, or does one person isolate themselves until the experience is over?

There’s a lot more to having a long, happy marriage.  But getting some of the above under your belt first will put you on the right path early.