Rating: C
It plays like an extended episode of Mr. Show. What starts out as an inspired parody of Tommy (or other kick-ass rock opera) sputters out into cliche’ after rock cliche’ that we’ve already seen The D do on screen or in videos.
Was it fun if you were not a D fan? Probably not.
Is it required viewing for All Who Want To Rock with the Greatest Band In The World? Definitely.
But only as a rental.
Rating: A-
Rated R for pretty much everything you can think of.
Hands down, The Most Offensive film I have ever seen. And funny as shit.
And no, I won’t tell you anything else. Go see it.
Rating: a solid B
The good thing is that it’s not necessary to know the characters from the comic strip ahead of time. I’ve tried reading the comic in the past – I don’t find it overly funny. Maybe I’ll try reading it again based on the movie to see if my opinion of the paper version has changed.
Animation? Not as good as Pixar’s work
Laugh-level? I laughed more during ICE AGE 2. It’s still amusing, but not bust-a-gut-funny-ha-ha.
Rating: 1 out of 5
Rated: R for boobs and comical graphic violence.
Where to begin? Nothing scary about it at all, considering the Jason and Freddy histories. More of a comedy like the SCARY MOVIES series has become. Really, a parody of itself. And at a bit over 90 minutes, about 20 minutes too long.
But it had boobs and a small handful of mildly amusing lines, so it’s not all that bad. If the audience you’re with yells back as the screen, then you may have a good time watching this dreck.
Rating: see below for explanation
Rated: PG-13 for action movie violence, really creepy evil undead skeletons/zombies, a whole lot of drinking, some blood, and a wee bit of pirate sexual innuendo. Basically, all the stuff that pirates do best.
This Jerry Bruckheimer film is based on the beloved Disney ride of the same name. It happens to be the last ride that Walt worked on before he died, and is considered by many to be the best ride at the Disney parks. Would Walt be happy with this film? I’d say…. yes. There are enough homages to the ride that fit in context with the film without being cheesy, and yet the film stands alone. Will it make the ride a bit more… interesting? understandable? Perhaps… and therein lies the fun.
Rating: 2 out of 5
Rated: PG-13 for action-movie violence, occasional bad language, and Rebecca Stamos naked in silhouette.
Got to watch this one at a morning screening. I’m glad I didn’t waste an afternoon or evening watching this dreck.
A disclaimer: The James Caan edition of Rollerball is one of my favorite movies. Nice homage: in the new one, they keep the classic “Jon-a-than! Jon-a-than!” chant that makes the Caan version awesome.
It’s sort of like the Planet of the Apes remake: it’s not awful, and it’s intended to stand on its own. But the originals in both cases were so much more inspired.
The first one: The game was easy to follow and understand. Skaters go around the rink, pick up the ball, and slam it into the scoring pod. Can be shown with one camera.
The new one: The game is on a figure-8 track (left over from RollerGames? Where’s the alligator pit?) with a bunch of hampster habittrails and ramps and stuff. You never get a good sense of how the game is played or who any of the team players are (or which team they’re on).
The plotlines are similar: the game is run by The Corporation and Jonathan tries to figure out his role in the game. Not a bad updating of the plot; the execution should have been done MUCH better.
There are a ton of bad directing choices in the film, but a lot of action scenes were cut; expect to see them uncut on the DVD.
Rating: 2 out of 5
Rated PG-13 for language and brief implied violence
For comparison purposes, a buddy of mine is giving it 3 out of 5. He was apparently feeling more generous than I was tonite.
It’s three parts One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, two parts Starman, and one part Risky Business.
I really enjoyed the show up to the half-way point, where it became another dull, boring analytical-type movie. Very “vanilla”.
Is it a good date film? Sure. It’s not romantic or anything, it’s just not offensive. It’s just…. bleh.
Rating: 2 out of 5
Rated R for action-movie violence, a little gore, profanity, and a topless Halle Berry.
The answer: Swordfish.
The question: What do you get when you cross Die Hard, Speed, Dog Day Afternoon, and The Net?
A spectacular opening sequence that out-Matrixes The Matrix may draw applause in your theatre, but the rest of the movie doesn’t continue the excitement. John Travolta turns in an almost reasonable performance, but unfortunately seems to have fallen into the Nick Cage School of Walking through a Role.
It’s not unwatchable tripe, and in many ways has some value as a summer popcorn muncher. It just could have been so much better than it is. Luckily, all the computer/hacker sequences are believable (for 2001). If only we had a solid character (either on the good team or the evil team) to cheer for. Instead, we get a mish-mash of characters we don’t totally care for one way or the other.
(to be honest, while walking out, I stuck my head into Moulin Rouge in the next theatre just so I would be reminded of what “summer movie spectacle” is all about — ’cause Swordfish isn’t it.)