Monthly Archives: July 2009

How To Get Started in the “Film” Industry*


By web gangsta | Published:

Inside Deep Throat documentary*the Adult Film industry, that is.

Yes, this post will point you in the direction you need to GET STARTED IN THE ADULT FILM INDUSTRY.

For example, if you wanted to made a film for HUMPFEST.

Besides, it’s good to throw a couple of NSFW links out there for you frequent Web Watch readers.

NSFW = “Not Safe For Work”, for those of you who don’t know what it means. No, we’re not linking to sites featuring nekkid photos, but the content in all of today’s links may be a bit more graphic than what you’ve been used to seeing here on Web Watch. Be appropriately warned.

Continue reading HOW TO GET STARTED IN THE “FILM” INDUSTRY*

Movie Review: Humpday


By web gangsta | Published:

Rated R for adult language, frank sexual dialogue and situations, and some uncomfortable nudity

Rating: C+

Web Watch agrees about what others have pointed out, that Humpday is part of the “mumblecore” film genre that consists of groups of actors talking – mumbling, on occasion – in a quasi-improvised fashion on various topics while a handheld camera bobbles around to make the audience a little queasy.  Just like on HBO’s Curb Your Enthusiasm, a mumblecore film has a general guideline of where the scene needs to go, but not necessarily a script leading the actors directly from point A to point B. In other words, turn the actors loose and let the cameras roll.

Humpday revolves around two buddies who haven’t seen each other in 10 years. As they are catching up on old times, they hear about Seattle’s infamous HumpFest, a film festival dedicated to showing amateur porn films.

Note: HumpFest takes place this year on October 9, so there is still plenty of time to get your 5 minute submissions in by the deadline. If you decide to participate, extra-credit goes for those films that incorporate any of the following props: a pink slip (layoff or undergarment), Mormon undergarments, motorcycle boots, e-stim unit, and Aplets & Cotlets.

So what should two buddies who haven’t seen each in 10 years, hopped up on some good pot and scotch, do?  They decide that the best way to win an amateur porn film contest is to make the one amateur porn film that nobody would expect anyone to make:  two straight guys doing it.

Yes, it appears that the film is a slightly skewed version of Kevin Smith’s Zack and Miri Make a Porno, but with dudes.  And quite a bit more dialogue-heavy.  Humpday is billed as a comedy, but there are only so many improved jokes that are going to really work well.  For Web Watch, many of the jokes seemed to fall flat.  But we give the filmmakers credit for trying.

In essence, Humpday is a film version of a common question Web Watch has heard in bars across the country:  “Would one dude kiss another dude for a million dollars?”  While in a bar the answer is usually, “for a million dollars? hell yeah…”, Humpday takes a more realistic approach when the best buddies have to get down to the performance part of the film.  It seems things get more complicated when it’s not just bar talk and a hypothetical million dollar paycheck.

Compared to the numerous favorable reviews Humpday has received since its Sundance debut, this may be a case where Web Watch is just not as much of a fan of this genre as others are. As with all movies, YMMV.

What Are The Odds? (a different look at some statistics)


By web gangsta | Published:

Whenever Web Watch visits Las Vegas, we like to watch people play the “carnival” games scattered across the casino.

You know the games – high visibility on the gaming floor, but not a lot of chance that the people playing will actually walk away a winner.  An example:  we once watched someone blow through about $1000 in 10 minutes playing Casino War.  Yes, the children’s card game WAR as played in a casino.  He didn’t stand a chance (he should have moved to craps or blackjack, where the odds were much more in his favor).

Knowing what the odds are in any scenario, whether it be a game of chance or a life-altering event, is important.

But odds need to be put into perspective.  One could tell you that you have a 1-in-6 chance of taking the unshaken beer out of the 6-pack carrier during a game of Russian Beer Roulette, or they could just bet whether you can roll a six on a die.  They’re the same odds, but sometimes you need these things pointed out to you.

Continue reading WHAT ARE THE ODDS? (A DIFFERENT LOOK AT SOME STATISTICS)

37 Things To Do If Captured by a Flying Saucer


By web gangsta | Published:

Web Watch cares about its readers.

That’s why, as a public service announcement, Web Watch is proud to bring you this LIST OF THINGS TO DO IF CAPTURED BY ALIENS AND ABDUCTED ONTO A FLYING SAUCER OR UFO.

Continue reading 37 THINGS TO DO IF CAPTURED BY A FLYING SAUCER

Texts From Last Night


By web gangsta | Published:

Web Watch enjoys having a drink with friends, and on occasion there is a need to send a Twitter message out about the current festivities.

Web Watch has covered such drunk twittering (“dwittering”) in previous posts, but we have not covered the more dangerous, come-back-to-haunt-you act of drunk texting.

Continue reading TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT

10 Things People Have Trouble Throwing Away, and Other Clutter Statistics


By web gangsta | Published:

Are you a pack rat?

You’re not alone.

We’ve grown into a nation full of, well… stuff.  With no place to put it, no way to organize it.  We mean to, but we just have trouble doing it.

Here are the TEN THINGS PEOPLE HAVE THE MOST TROUBLE THROWING AWAY: Continue reading 10 THINGS PEOPLE HAVE TROUBLE THROWING AWAY, AND OTHER CLUTTER STATISTICS

Even if McGriddles Weren’t Tasty, They’d Still Make Us Happy


By web gangsta | Published:

Why do McGriddles, that tasty treat from McDonald’s that consists of egg, cheese, and bacon lovingly wrapped around two syrup-soaked pancakes, taste so good – and as a result, makes us happy?

It may surprise you that a STUDY ON THE NEUROSCIENCE OF MCGRIDDLES has shown that our happiness about McGriddles is not related at all with the taste of the McGriddle.  McDonald’s could serve us cardboard-wrapped cardboard, and it would be happily accepted just as well (assuming it was edible, of course).

Continue reading EVEN IF MCGRIDDLES WEREN’T TASTY, THEY’D STILL MAKE US HAPPY

A Walt Disney World Bathroom Photoblog


By web gangsta | Published:

Everybody Pees
Everybody Pees

Cass and Robert are big Disney fans.

They’ve been to Walt Disney World numerous times, and taken a Disney Cruise or two.

But Cass has a little bit of an obsession with the Disney facilities, as she felt the need to post PHOTOS OF EVERY WOMEN’S RESTROOM AT WALT DISNEY WORLD.

Continue reading A WALT DISNEY WORLD BATHROOM PHOTOBLOG

Movie Review: The Ugly Truth


By web gangsta | Published:

Rated R for adult situations, language, and plenty of graphic, dirty sex talk. 

Rating: B

THE UGLY TRUTH is yet another romantic comedy wrapped around the basic Cyrano de Bergerac plot. 

In this case, Katherine Heigl is the lovelorn shy character who just wants to meet the man of her dreams, but she can’t without the help of salty trash talker Gerard Butler whispering what to say and do into her ear.   But who does Heigl end up with: the hottie, the ugly, someone else, or nobody at all?  And that’s why you’ll sit through the end of the film to find out. Continue reading MOVIE REVIEW: THE UGLY TRUTH

Some Parents Insist Their Children Wear Clothes (This is News?)


By web gangsta | Published:

The New York Times, always looking for a story, decided to report on the seemingly GROWING TREND OF 3-to-5-YEAR-OLD CHILDREN RUNNING AROUND NAKED.

Apparently, stripping off ones clothes and running around the house before bath time has expanded into more of an “anywhere, anytime” thing, especially in the pre-school set.

Continue reading SOME PARENTS INSIST THEIR CHILDREN WEAR CLOTHES (THIS IS NEWS?)

Preserving Email in a Time Capsule


By web gangsta | Published:

As we covered in Web Watch back in November 2005, FORBES MAGAZINE CREATED AN EMAIL TIME CAPSULE PROJECT.

We here at Web Watch thought we’d revisit the FORBES TIME CAPSULE to see how it went.

For those of you who weren’t following Web Watch back then, Forbes took a month to collect over 140,000 messages and set up a system to deliver those messages up to 20 years later.

Continue reading PRESERVING EMAIL IN A TIME CAPSULE

Who Are These Guys?


By web gangsta | Published:

Remember a few years ago when Web Watch was one of the first to bring to you ONE RED PAPERCLIP, Kyle MacDonald’s quest to trade up from one red paperclip all the way up to a house? 

If you haven’t followed the completion of the story, Kyle did succeed in finally getting a house… along with a book deal, speaking engagements, and a possible movie out of the whole thing.

Continue reading WHO ARE THESE GUYS?

Problems with Food Network Recipes: Jerk Chicken and Zarela’s Creamy Rice Casserole


By web gangsta | Published:

Oaxaca Traditional Recipes
Oaxaca Traditional Recipes Cookbook by Zalera Martinez

Web Watch enjoys watching Food Network, and one of the limited-run series that Food Network has been airing for the past few weeks is entitled THE BEST THING I EVER ATE.

Each episode has various Food Network stars (Guy Fieri, Duff Goldman, Bobby Flay, Giada De Laurentiis, etc) raving about the Best Things They’ve Ever Eaten in different categories. If you’re a foodie, these are the places around the country that you should stick your head into to see what’s up.

One episode, entitled “Obsessions”, covered foods from Miami to San Francisco. Finally, an episode that featured three(!) restaurants that Web Watch has already visited. So far, so good.

Continue reading PROBLEMS WITH FOOD NETWORK RECIPES: JERK CHICKEN AND ZARELA’S CREAMY RICE CASSEROLE

How Fast Can You Send a Text Message?


By web gangsta | Published:

Sending a text message can be tough on the thumbs. 

Web Watch, however, envisions a time in the future when the full-size computer keyboards that we know today are piled in the junkpile next to the typewriter, as more and more people grow up being comfortable typing in such a small space.

But how efficient can a peanut-sized keyboard be when you’re actually trying to type something meaningful?

The World’s Fastest Texter competition is what it’s all about.
Continue reading HOW FAST CAN YOU SEND A TEXT MESSAGE?

Finally! A Reason to Buy a GPS – Custom Voices!


By web gangsta | Published:

If you have been looking for a reason to get a TOM TOM or other standalone GPS navigation unit, here’s an update to a topic covered in Web Watch many, many moons ago:  HOMER SIMPSON IS NOW AVAILABLE TO GUIDE TOM TOM USERS TO THEIR DESTINATIONS.

Continue reading FINALLY! A REASON TO BUY A GPS — CUSTOM VOICES!